Tag Archives: Fun

How Did Stella Get Her Groove Back… ?

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Lisztomania (Alex Metric Remix) – Phoenix

Just got back from DJigging a big charity event. Also known as a D lister party. D-listers. D-lusters. Reality show heads. Famous ex-wives. People in commercials. Rich old men. Young empty women. Desperate older women, out looking for husbands. Empty. Vapid. Fake. Gift bags. Mighty fun! Thank funk I was DJigging. At least I discovered that romance novels are a great ice-breaker. Got home. Done. Dusted. Dancing? Eh. Nay. Kind of has me pondering. How’s my plan going? You know. Every man needs a plan, plan. So. In the past month I have:

  • Boozed
  • Danced
  • DJ’igged
  • Boozed
  • Been a single parent
  • Been a tour guide
  • Been a host
  • Boozed
  • Watched intense Harrison Ford movies
  • Watched brooding Keanu Reeves movies
  • Criticised movies I’ve never even seen
  • Boozed
  • Watched stand-up
  • Watched soccer matches
  • Played soccer matches
  • Enjoyed pool days
  • Lounged about
  • Boozed
  • Read romance novels
  • Read scripts
  • Read books about writing
  • Prepared for writing
  • Boozed
  • Ate
  • Slept
  • Flown around
  • Boozed
  • Did this
  • Did that
  • Paid rent early
  • Almost ended up being on a really big TV show
  • Went on a sunbed

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I’m A Little Teapot…

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Sweet Disposition (Joe Maz Remix) – Temper Trap

In case you were wondering, not every day in L-Hey is nuts. Today was pretty normal. Shopped. Washed. Gymed. Chilled. Mostly recovered. Sunday was pretty mighty. Man cures. Just the one. Happy hour. Oh Jesus. Pub crawl. Impromptu. Riding mechanical maniac bulls. Singing the booze. Bumping into randomers. Bringing along stragglers. Ploughing on. Finishing it all off with a night cap and deep gibberish conversations in a car park at half two in the morning. Savage day. But kind of normal, in a way. Could happen anywhere. Unlike, say, Saturday. Funk me pink. Uniquely L-Hey day. Random. Dumb. Full on fun!

Up at 7 bells for a photo shoot. Random. 3 hours sleep due to DJigging. Dumb. Not too sure what the shoot’s for. Need a few professional photos to add to my  portfolio of one headshot. So I’m told. So I’m in. Cover of Women’s Weekly all the way! Shoot was on in Santa Monica. Pier. Beach. Lovely. Arrive. Cloudy. Grey skies. Looks like it might rain. Waves crashing in. Bed calling. Start throwing it out there that maybe we should reschedule. Wait for better light. Sheen from the sea is very bright. Spouting out complete gibber. Vain attempts to get me back to bed. No joy. Heere now, let’s see what we can do. Cue teapot. Continue Reading »

Miami, Unreal! Private Jets, Dancing! Sludge, Eh…

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Miami – Will Smith

Car services picks me up. 9 bells. Slightly late. Balls. Farewell to Bob. Out the door. Back to London. Single parenthood over. 9.15. Good to go. Off to Van Nuys. Private airport. Same one in Entourage, I’m told en route. The Man. The Jack. Chowder. Charlotta. And a late ape. Weekend break in Miami. The Man’s generosity knows no boundaries! Giddy up! Flight leaving at 10 bells. Are we going to miss our time slot because of the late ape? Nay. No check-in. No security. Nothing. Drive up to a gate. Press the buzzer. Stay in the car. Drive through. Drops you off at the jet. Hassle free. Private on. Nice jet? Unreal. Like a G6? I think so. Oh Jesus. Jump out. Driver takes care of your luggage. You can just admire the view. No ID check. No shoes off. Belt off. Pants down. Nada. Just stroll on. Sit down. Stewardess says hi. Champagne? Bloody Mary? Cup of tea? Ehhh. All three? Oh Betsy!! Drug barons must be zipping to and fro? Miami on!!!

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Bob And Norm

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Bob – Drive-By Truckers

So my buddy Bob is visiting at the moment. Two weeks in LA, first time here. Go on the Bob! Now I fully realise what it’s like to be a single parent. No longer just a randumb dope on my own. Permanent plus one as well. Juggling tour guidance with work. Detached from my own thoughts. Neglecting my mistress, el blogaruu. Tough going for a Nark like myself. Which is why I’ve now taken a vow of abstinence until marriage. Better safe than sorry. Ahum’p. Like a few of my buddies, Bob has bought my book Randumb, but hasn’t read it. Doesn’t actually admit this to me, so I like to ask him what’s his favourite part and then he changes the subject (Unless he just has no favourite part! Ha. Eh. Meh). As a result it’s fair to say he had no clue what to expect of the LA way. Bob, say goodbye to Norm… Continue Reading »

Tip Of The Night. Top Of The Morn!

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Better late than never. My top songs of the blogaruu from 2010. Not that they were released in 2010. Just that I used them at some stage in the blog. Either I really like the song. Or. I am a fan of the story that went along with it. So.. Song. Which blogaruu. And a reason why as well. Not sure how many. Short and sweet!

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Oh Betsy…

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Everything Is Everything – Lauryn Hill

Rattled, to say the least. New Year’s. Cat allergies. Ape man flu type thing which keeps rearing it’s horrendous head. Not feeling the May West. Betsy. Brain is working at 10%, at most. Now would be a great time to mock me. Probably have a comeback thought of by Wednesday. Quip me with your mocking stick. Quip me. First blogaruu of 2011. Amazing, I know. 2010 has been a mighty year. It is what you make of it, if you ask me. People seem to enjoy complaining at this time of year. Actually blame the year for all their bad luck, woes, misfortunes, etc. Perhaps the year was not at fault. Perhaps. Think aboot that, Moaning Marys. Not a big fan of looking back, as when I did it for the book, it involved a lot of dredging. Ending up waist high in my mind’s swamp. However, I will go back to the blogaruu I wrote exactly this day one year ago. A mighty blog where I decided it was “Time to horse a few targets out there. Not really going to be ‘resolutions’ though. The word doesn’t hold much weight to me. Resolves nothing.” I knew writing the targets down would eventually have a use! Everyman needs a plan. So. How did I get on… Continue Reading »