Down Under – Men At Work
Mighty weekend. Sold a pair of signed Pants Off… RanDumber On! underwear Merkandise for $70. (The standard has been set!. Shop on!) And some fine folk sent me a scan of this RanDumber review. First one in an Australian newspaper that I know of. Going down under! All the way down under town. Where women glow and men plunder. Plus. Always good to dominate the Kerry. Duu! (Ozzy. Oz. Get it? Ahh hush! Review ends at old. OK. Good duck!) Continue Reading »
Handle With Care – Traveling Wilburys
So the other day I walked into the doctor’s and said:
Hello, doctor Ian, I have this slight cough for a while now, can you-
Say no more, he said, just drop the pants, jump up on the bed, lie on your side and we’ll take a look.
Down they went. Up I jumped. Over I lay. And only then did I think:
Hmmm. O-Kaaaayyyyyyy!
So that was odd. Cold. Knuckley. And uncomfortable.
But at least the cough’s now gone.
Finger Licking Bad
Speaking of fingers, there I was yesterday, dressed as a leper chaun, getting ready Continue Reading »
Cornflake Boy (Solomun Vocal Remix) – Marbert Rocel
So earlier today I had a mighty meeting. Mighty man. Who also just happens to be a tres successful producer. TV. Movies. All those kind of likes. Mighty mighty!
First time in Soho House too. Savage venue. Plush. Lush. Gush… I could go on and on about the savage venue. Or. Could perhaps just show you these photos… Continue Reading »
You Can Call Me Al – Paul Simon
So this is pretty mighty…
You know what this means, right?
I now win a million dollars! Wuu huu!
Right?
Huh?
Ahem.
Dance on! Book two all the way!!!
Keeping The Dream Alive – Munchener Freiheit
Big Bad Wolf – Duck Sauce
Carmaggedon: Some spoof. Never seen the roads so quiet. Hollywood hype! Waste of a shotgun. End of the world will have to wait.
Me: Some idiot. Have you ever tried to take shortcuts, even though you’ve never been in the place before? Some clown. Driving back from a gig on Saturday. Never there before. But I know where I’m going. Let’s take this left here. Down this lane. Now if I just swing around on this 270˚ angle. Go up this hill. Along this back road. And I should be home… Why am I on the Pacific Coast Highway?Heading for San Francisco? Some funking idiot. Berating myself in the car: Why are you trying to take shortcuts?! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?!!! Only took me thirty five minutes to get back to the original road I was on. Some. Ape. Dope.
DJigs: Corporate gigs are the way to go. Forget bars or clubs. One night. About two hours of work. Rent. Sorted. Giddy up! No wonder singers and the likes do those weird gigs in Saudia Arabia or on a Russian billionaire’s yacht. Money talks. Let’s not mention how irregular they can be. Shhh. Nice views too. Rooftop on… Continue Reading »
The Night Out – Martin Solveig
Apparently. If you have Megan Fox in a headline, people will automatically click on it. Did it work? Nice insider trick for any copy writer out there! Speaking of inside information: You’d be surprised at how many people book me for DJ sets without ever hearing a mix I’ve done. No clue if I’m good or not. Amazing. Take Friday. Deep down the writing well. Late afternoon. Email: Hello fine sir. Got your contact details from another DJ. Want to play at this venue tonight? Emmm. New venue. In fact, probably Hollywood’s new hot spot. SBE group’s latest venture. (If you’ve ever watched The Hills, all those clubs are SBE.) Anyway. Decide. In. Or. Nay? Money wasn’t what one might expect. But. Foot in the door and all that. Cool. Dance on. I’m in. And just like that, you’re DJing at another Hollywood hot spot. Mighty. Ish… Continue Reading »
Enough Talk, More Writing! 