(Forgot aboot this blogaruu. A week old but better up than in… )
Speaking of teachers, does anyone remember my science teacher from 4th year? Sound man. Bald head. Round glasses. Slightly Larry David looking. Just not as big a nose. Mr. O’Connor? Doesn’t sound right but pretend so. Anyways, his lessons often used to get lost in translation. Mostly down to his accent. Slightly country-ish. Farmer like. But only on certain words. Out of all the sciences he had a thing for chemistry. Big fan. Always up the top of the class, on his own, experimenting away. Giving you plenty of time to stare out the window. And wonder if you were going bald (I had this weird thing in 4th year where I was convinced I was going bald. Used to have conversations with my biology teacher about it. Me arguing for. Him against. Maybe that is why I let the fro flow. And now have a hedge on my head). Back to Mr. O’Connor. Doing experiments. Liked to spring questions, see if you were following. Every single time, his odd way of saying words would throw me off. So every single time, I would have to tell him… Sir, I have no clue what a pint of isle is? Getting him annoyed. Thinking I was mocking him. Ending in detention. See. He was actually asking what the point of the oil was in the experiment. But seeing as I liked to drift off, I never copped on quickly enough as to what his point ever was. Kind of like you are perhaps wondering now what mine could possibly be. Obviously… Chilean miners! Seriously… Continue Reading »
Like all good teachers, Sex Boy Dave reminded me of a valuable lesson on Wednesday… People love free stuff! Sexy Boy Dave being a comedian at stand-up the other night. Obviously. Self-claimed self-made millionaire. Selling sex toys online. Unfortunately for Sex Boy Dave, everything I have wrote so far is at least thrice as funny as his brutally cocky act. Brutal. Still though, in fairness to him, he did remind me that people are big fans of free. But while Sex Boy Dave finally managed to get himself a few cheers by handing out various sex toys from his website at the end of his act, my free gift is more aural pleasure for your ears. Tut. My bad. New member to the online media familia… Blogaruu… Vlogaruu… And now… Podaruu! Free chapters from my book. In the shape of podcasts! Aural on! Name of the podcast shall be ‘Hearing Haze… Not just a phase!’ Now you can download and listen to my gibber on the go. iPods on. Mighty. Wuu huu! Sex Boy Dave… Nada on my gift! So without any further a duu, my first attempt. Tad rough. Rambling. But a mighty little beast!!! Perk up an ear. Listen on… Continue Reading »
Does anyone remember my German teacher’s name in secondary school? Slightly odd German lady? Anyways, back when I can’t fully remember, I had a German exam in school. Questions and essay. Took my time. Didn’t want to rush. Get the essay word for word perfect. Make sure it looked all neat and tidy. Like a plonk. At least a neat plonk. Time ticking. Almost finished. About to hand it up… Oh Jesus… Forgot to add that sentence in the essay part. Added it. Just aboot to hand it back up. Until I remembered another mighty sentence. Oh sweet Lord, I must add that!?! Kept adding. Tweaking. Fixing. Making sure it was spot on perfect. Time starting running out. Didn’t care. Just needed to fix this. And that. Time ticking. Me tocking. Kept going. Teacher waiting. Hand it up. It’s fine. Stop trying to fix it. Time up. Hand it up now or I won’t take it, she said. Two minutes, I aped. She left. I fixed. Ran after her. Declined my late entry. Ah please… Accepted it. After she told me to cop on. Almost failed the exam because I was a perfectionist. Pardon… ? What’s that? You think I’m a perfectionist? Why thank you! So kind… Continue Reading »
Have you ever been gaily skipping down a street. Skipping high! Wonderful skips! Bouncing along. Picking up momentum. Skip on! Skip high! So young! So free! So… Clip! Curb. Path. Stone. Your own shoe. Fall. Dumble. Stumble. Down ape goes. Holding your knee on the path. Cursing the skipping. Dumb skips. Making me dumble. Should never have skipped so high, so quick! Perhaps I’ll just chill a while. Stay down on the path. By these gutters. Lost all my momentum. All that curb’s fault. Tut. This week has been kind of like that. Quite the ridiculously annoying successfully-frustrating week. Plus my man period (rent) on top of it all!?! Ugh boots have been on. What goes up… Sometimes keeps going up and up, to be true. Which is mighty and obviously ideal. But then other times… Stagnates and floats in exactly the same spot. Like a dead frog. Floating. Bobbing. Dumbling along. Going nowhere. Wasting time. Wheels turning. Barely churning. Well that’s if you had wheels. And you actually made the effort to churn them. Instead of just waiting. Highly frustrating. Immensely annoying. Kind of like this opening gibber… Continue Reading »
To be true, it has been a mighty, mighty, mighty week of art club. Gems and masterpieces cropping up all over the place (You never do know!). Make art all the way! Art on! People who don’t get my gibberish seem to be getting a tad annoyed by all the abstract art comments. Well, apologies, that those folk did not get it. Perhaps I have been a tad too abstract. Perhaps. Blame the art. And the spray paint fumes. Although, always good to smell a bit of paint. Anyways, good news for those oddly annoyed. Last night, unfortunately, art club went into a hiatus. Boo. Bring back the art. Bring back the freedom. Tut. So, in an attempt to keep the buzz from art club flowing, there was only ever one option… Try something else new. And that indeed I did do. God loves a tire. And a trier. Which is why I went along to a class earlier today. More an audition. Good old improv… Continue Reading »
Enough Talk, More Writing! 
