Tag Archives: Gibberish

TGIFTG… Turkey On!

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Rollin’ & Scatchin’ (Chilly Gonzales Rework) – Daft Punk

While Ireland is being battered by all angles at home, it seems, I too have some important news to start off with: Got a hair cut this week. As opposed to a haircut. Hairdressers truly do baffle me. Ask for one thing, forced to deal with the some thing they give back. Tried to be as specific as possible. Almost as if I was asking them to do me this one favour, just one time. Please? Even had photos to help me describe what it was that I wanted. Hairdresser just looked at me. Down at me. Disgust. Contempt. Perplexed. Nonplussed?! All of the above. Eyes to heaven. And then went off and did her own thing. Cut one hair here. Cut half a hair there. Chat with her buddies. Slipped off to the bathroom. Still not finished. Please wait. Chilling and twirling in the chair while she disappeared. Returned. Did not cut one more hair. Decided, actually, she was finished. My hair was exactly as I had described. Twirled me around in the seat to show me the back of my head in the handheld mirror as if this was some sort of fool-proof proof that she did exactly as she was asked. Fooled me. Couldn’t see myself properly with their flattering light. Went to the bathroom to see if that was any better. Even worse. Made me look better. False light and smoke mirrors everywhere. Continue Reading »

What Is The Pint Of The Isle?

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The Best Day – Atmosphere

(Forgot aboot this blogaruu. A week old but better up than in… )

Speaking of teachers, does anyone remember my science teacher from 4th year? Sound man. Bald head. Round glasses. Slightly Larry David looking. Just not as big a nose. Mr. O’Connor? Doesn’t sound right but pretend so. Anyways, his lessons often used to get lost in translation. Mostly down to his accent. Slightly country-ish. Farmer like. But only on certain words. Out of all the sciences he had a thing for chemistry. Big fan. Always up the top of the class, on his own, experimenting away. Giving you plenty of time to stare out the window. And wonder if you were going bald (I had this weird thing in 4th year where I was convinced I was going bald. Used to have conversations with my biology teacher about it. Me arguing for. Him against. Maybe that is why I let the fro flow. And now have a hedge on my head). Back to Mr. O’Connor. Doing experiments. Liked to spring questions, see if you were following. Every single time, his odd way of saying words would throw me off. So every single time, I would have to tell him… Sir, I have no clue what a pint of isle is? Getting him annoyed. Thinking I was mocking him. Ending in detention. See. He was actually asking what the point of the oil was in the experiment. But seeing as I liked to drift off, I never copped on quickly enough as to what his point ever was. Kind of like you are perhaps wondering now what mine could possibly be. Obviously… Chilean miners! Seriously… Continue Reading »

Ponderful!

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As your keen eye may or may not have noticed, multiple media mediums are currently being experimented with. Practicing. Tweaking. Whuring. Trials. Along with buckets of errors. Trial on! So seeing as I am horsing out the multitudes of gibber, might as well throw a new vlogaruu into the mix. Wuu huu! Blog. Vlog. Pod-g. Next stop… Fog!?! Hilarious. Shh. Ponderful on…

Great news. Blogaruu is back in the writing chair tomorrow. Yay! says… ? Duu.

Gimperfection

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Rock And Roll Ain’t Noise Pollution – AC/DC

Does anyone remember my German teacher’s name in secondary school? Slightly odd German lady? Anyways, back when I can’t fully remember, I had a German exam in school. Questions and essay. Took my time. Didn’t want to rush. Get the essay word for word perfect. Make sure it looked all neat and tidy. Like a plonk. At least a neat plonk. Time ticking. Almost finished. About to hand it up… Oh Jesus… Forgot to add that sentence in the essay part. Added it. Just aboot to hand it back up. Until I remembered another mighty sentence. Oh sweet Lord, I must add that!?! Kept adding. Tweaking. Fixing. Making sure it was spot on perfect. Time starting running out. Didn’t care. Just needed to fix this. And that. Time ticking. Me tocking. Kept going. Teacher waiting. Hand it up. It’s fine. Stop trying to fix it. Time up. Hand it up now or I won’t take it, she said. Two minutes, I aped. She left. I fixed. Ran after her. Declined my late entry. Ah please… Accepted it. After she told me to cop on. Almost failed the exam because I was a perfectionist. Pardon… ? What’s that? You think I’m a perfectionist? Why thank you! So kind… Continue Reading »

Shee Shuu. Ahem… The Sexth Sense.

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Girls Just Wanna Have Fun – Starfunker

‎’As I threw her to the ground her buxom bounced with delight, so I gently nudged her face with my foot, leaving her gasp for more…’ Opening line of my new romance novel. The one which I am writing to tie over the folk who want to read more aboot… Schex. Shee shuu. Ahem. Whatever it is that you may call it. Something which is distinctly lacking from the blogaruu. Details, at least. Innuendos might be bouncing off the walls. But details have been stripped bare. Stark. Naked. Teasing. All talk. Little action. (Is this some sort of an innuendo by my sub-brain?! Perhaps. If so… Horrendous! Moving on!) Perhaps it is an Irish thing. Perhaps it was initially so not to look like an ape. Perhaps it was realising your parents, grandparents, younger cousins and all other folk would start to read about your adventures. Perhaps it was out of pure and utter respect for the other parties involved. Ahum. Perhaps all of the above! Perhaps. Who knows. Well. I do. But moving on.

Actually. Staying put. Perhaps I should’ve included more in the book. Perhaps there should’ve been less. Perhaps one did not think that others wanted to read aboot that. Perhaps sex does sell. Perhaps we wait and see what book two holds. Duu. Although perhaps I should set up an alternative blogaruu that tells purely of adventures in that world. Perhaps. Especially as L-Hey seems to be the most sexed up place which has ever existed. Possessing the libido of an 18 year old dude mixed with a 30 year old lady. If it were an animal, its name would be Roger. Highly revved-up engine. Not only that but perhaps all of this is then in turn coupled with the perhaps that you have an odd sense… Ever read the book Blink? When you just know something straight away but you’re not sure how. But you know. You? No? Yes? Kind of the same. Let’s just call it… The Sexth Sense!?! Continue Reading »

Tweeting Out Man!

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Driving Home From The Beach (The Feeling Of) – Teen Daze

Past few days have been spent galavanting aboot good old San Fran! Forgot how mighty it is up here. Not quite up there with L-Hey but still dancing on in her own way. Maybe it’s the fact that it’s actually a city with streets that have people and tall buildings which run parallel to other streets that are filled with more buildings and people who are all scurrying around by foot and there’s a centre to the city which is actually downtown and all this is walkable or tram-able and it’s a city! As opposed to a sprawled barren desert. Which does have streets. But the good ones are all about a 5 minute drive from each other. And go on for miles. And all the good stuff is spread out over those miles along these streets. So you can only really drive. Which means you then just spend a lot of your time sitting in traffic. Which is fun. I suppose. But a city buzz does make a nice change.

Although the fact that all the folk I know in San Fran are so sound and I haven’t seen them in so long might be more of the reason why it is so mighty here. Ridiculously sound. Go on the Irish! Go on the people understanding my accent! Go on the endless levels of boozing on! Go on the use of ‘sch’ instead of just ‘s’… ‘Schome nice pint of Schtella. Divil a bit.’ Whatever divil a bit actually means (Anyone?). Go on the endless cups of tea! Chats about tea! Go on the Irish-ness! Reason I’m up in San Fran was to go to my cousin’s wedding. Mighty night, to be true. Day after. Maybe the day after that too. Might has been flowing! An added reason for the trip is so I can get some writing done. Well actually, some reading first, and then some writing. Read. And. Write. Dance. On. Plan. On. Reading part has been going well. Ish. Wuu! Writing part has been… Well… Tut… Honestly… I have a problem. Another, says you. Divil a bit, says an Irish man. Problem must stop. Ruining me. Need help. Starting to Tweet the funk out man!! Continue Reading »