Tag Archives: Ireland

My One Night Stand…

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Miss You – The Rolling Stones

Very sad day. Just took down my Christmas tree. Meant to do it last weekend but I couldn’t bear the thought/too lazy. Now it’s down. Meaning Christmas is over. Done. Dusted. Out. Buried. No more. Hard to take. Although the thing is:

Does Christmas ever even start in LA?

Ehh…

No.

Not at all.

Week leading up to Christmas: No buzz. At all. Few places had decorations up, of course. Shops were plumping and pimping out Christmas deals. But all felt fake. Selling. As opposed to cheerful. Plus, I too was working a good bit – Book on – so it kept my mind off the cold, hardened, heathen, non-Christmas buzz in the air. People don’t even say ‘Happy Christmas’ here. It’s all ‘Happy Holidays!’ Just in case you somehow offend someone? Funk. That. Christmas. On! Ye whures.

Pint Per Pub. Shots Encouraged, But Purely Optional...

As always, 12 Pubs of Christmas held high hopes for kicking the Christmas buzz into gear. As always, initial responses to the mighty pub crawl were lukewarm/confused/uninterested/horrendous. Mighty. Thankfully, closer to the day, a group formed, Christmas jumpers were purchased, and the crawl was on. (Either way I was going on it but always nicer to have others in dodgy Christmas jumpers join you on your way.)

That was a good hoot at least. Quite and polite at first. Chug and chug at second. Warming up at third. Banter at fourth. And people out of their shells at five. As always, one quiet guy in the group burst out of his shell with a demonic smile. Hilarious guy who I know only as Dave. Don’t remember much about him. Just that Continue Reading »

Rent? Oh And Groceries. Obviously.

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Sunny (Mercury II Edit) – Marvin Gaye

Good morning. Proper Christmas blogaruu to come soon, hopefully. In lieu until then, how aboot some of my gibbering along on my buddy’s radio show? Mighty? I know! Rudebox on…

Why Do You Like Riding Hippos?

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An Argument With Myself – Jens Lekman

Sometimes a YouTube video can evoke so many questions:

  • Who are these people?
  • Is there actually a child in that pram?
  • Why does he like riding hippos?
  • What is the difference between liking someone and fancying them?
  • How big is his chest?

Saw this gem a few years back. Next day it was taken down. Thought it was lost forever. Thankfully: She has returned! Might be my favourite video ever. Two people arguing on a street in a town in Ireland. Quite simple. Ridiculously funny. Swearing is involved, so dodge on if that’s not your thing. Oh how I miss Ireland…

Eyes – Kaskade feat. Mindy Gledhill

Amerricka! Funk Yeah!

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I Want To Break Free – Mariachillout

Seeing as the rest of America is celebrating its birthday and its right to dance, I feel now is the perfect time to do a quick expose. Show the people of Ireland (et al) the truth! What it’s really like to live in LA. Won’t lie, pre-tty gruesome. Remember Schindler’s List? Kind of like that. Exactly. Ish. Maybe. Not at all…

So at times I’m required to work under absolutely dreadful conditions. Outside. Sweltering. Loud. Noisy. Crowded. Eye sores. Everywhere. Just. Tut. Terrible.

Apologies. Should’ve given ye a warning. My bad. As you can see, that was tough. To make matters even worse, some days we’re required to do this after work… Continue Reading »

Jiggling Jugs!

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No Diggity – Chet Faker 

Tough week. Realised a few things. Such as: My ability to make women puke is still going strong. Take yesterday. Setting up to DJig. Girl comes over to me. Big. Drunk. Mexican. (Big as in overweight. Drunk as in demented. Mexican as in Meximerican.) Stands in front of me. Starts pointing. Swaying. Pointing. Slurring. ‘You’rrrre verrree goood luuk inn.’ Why thank you. Suddenly her head dips. And then she pukes all over her own feet. Delightful. Looks back up at me. Smiles. And before I could ask if she was OK, she puked again. Beautiful. Thankfully her friends carried her off (with one oddly rubbing her breasts the entire time. Giving me dirty looks when I looked at her do so. Is that a girl thing?)

More good news: My ability to make girls Continue Reading »

Bob And Norm

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Bob – Drive-By Truckers

So my buddy Bob is visiting at the moment. Two weeks in LA, first time here. Go on the Bob! Now I fully realise what it’s like to be a single parent. No longer just a randumb dope on my own. Permanent plus one as well. Juggling tour guidance with work. Detached from my own thoughts. Neglecting my mistress, el blogaruu. Tough going for a Nark like myself. Which is why I’ve now taken a vow of abstinence until marriage. Better safe than sorry. Ahum’p. Like a few of my buddies, Bob has bought my book Randumb, but hasn’t read it. Doesn’t actually admit this to me, so I like to ask him what’s his favourite part and then he changes the subject (Unless he just has no favourite part! Ha. Eh. Meh). As a result it’s fair to say he had no clue what to expect of the LA way. Bob, say goodbye to Norm… Continue Reading »