Hey Boss… Where Me Worms?!


Far too much of today has been spent being far too confused. Someone changing the layout of my blogaruu… What was that aboot? That guy in Trader Joe’s who just drove his car into a bush next to me… ? That girl who started sobbing while ringing up my food at the till… ? That random dude in the green belly top and pink hat on sideways, who came up to me in the gym, informing me that he too enjoyed soccer – Ok? – and then just stood there. Looking at me. Until I put my iPod back on… Go on the gym. Funk off the confusion.

Thankfully today was also a highly productive day. Fixed up the blogaruu. Bought some food. Went to the gym. And that, was aboot it. Highly productive. Although I did discover a new sandwich today. Swordfish. Peas. Corn. Onions. Toasted. Savage. Oh Jesus. Highly productive day. Exciting stuff. One of those days. Two day hangover in full crystal swing. Feeling a tad ahem-ually hungover as well. What what. Full on weekend. Big day on Saturday. Shindig all the way. Slid into Sunday. Bells ringing. People glowing. Dancing. Non-stop. Top class. Top hat on. Suit pants off. Fun all round. And that’s all I remember aboot that. Encrypt on.

Sell Out, Sell Out

Although I do recall two things. Firstly: Pap smears really are vultures. Literally circling above the whole time. Some chumps. Odd enough. Saying that, hopefully they got my good side. Back of the head all the way! And secondly… Top hat. Black tie. Surprisingly. Look pretty Amish! A pretty Amish Irishman. New string in my dickie bow. Wuu. Oh, and eventually I remembered where my suit pants were. Took them off. Folded them. And put them under my sink. Obviously.

Anyways, back to today. Thankfully, one kind of productive thing did occur… Sold out once more. Book on. Although I’m now starting to think that maybe I’m not actually selling 5 million copies every time someone informs me that my muck has sold out online. Perhaps. Maybe Amazon should stock up on more copies. Purely as if they did, it might stop me ape-ishly exclaiming that I’m a sell out whenever it occurs (Doubtful. Sell out on!) Either way. Hippy days. And on a book note, back to this blogaruu. She’s been in the bank for a while. Time to release. And hopefully cure this hangover by doing so!


Almost never, on a daily basis, do I continually not get asked… What do you actually do during the day? Well actually I do. A fair bit. Particularly by people who work 9 -5 jobs. People seem to think I do nothing. Tut. Plenty of duu going on. Such as… Read on! Worked in nicely. When I was writing my own book of gibber I kind of fully weaned off reading books. Not wanting to take other styles or the likes. Should have read more, says you. I know, says I. Continue on, says he. Does he have to, says she. Now that my muck is out and aboot, books have been back on. Mighty little devices. Handheld labyrinths. Suck you in. And you might just get lost in one. Funking brilliant.  Truly. Dancing.

Tip Top 4...

So the point of this blogaruu… My top 4 book recommendations. Slightly off the topic. Whatever that topic may be. But still, these books are all mighty. And by reading these books, you may become mightier for it. Also, someone emailed me and actually asked me this. Talk about flogging a long winded answer. Mostly, my hungover brain really wants to release this blogaruu. Mighty on. Off we go…

1. The Alchemist – Paulo Coelho

Why So: Might inspire you to go do something dumb and chase whatever it may be that you really want to do.

Be warned: You may end up in LA.

2. A Short History of Nearly Everything – Bill Bryson

Why So: You will actually feel your brain growing from all the new info you learn while reading this. Unreal… The part about what would happen if a meteor hit the earth? And how close it is to almost happening on a daily basis?! It will blow your mind!

Be Warned: You will be hunting down conversations just so you can drop all your new nuggets of info subtly into them… ‘Yeah, great. So, eh, did you know… ‘

3. Lunar Park – Bret Easton Ellis

Why So: You know when you start reading at light speed just to see what happens next. Then force yourself to stop reading, so that the book will last longer. This book makes that happen. And may make you also want to write.

Be Warned: You will be scratching your head a fair bit. Not in a lice way. In a nice way. Oh Jesus.

4. The Road Less Traveled – Dr M. Scott Peck

Why So: If you ever go through a tough time, this book will might show you that all will be good in the long run. Wunderbar!

Be Warned: May also alter your views on monogamy. Or reinforce them.

Go On The Cure

Let’s be honest, this list could go on and on. But they are my top 4 off the top of my head. Didn’t even try to flog my own! Self praise. No praise. All that. Although – always a book whure – an Amazon review recently might actually be better than the book itself. Seriously. If you really insist on reading it, click -> here to read on. By the by, if you feel like you have any mighty recommendations for me, feel free to horse them into the comments section. Hangover off. Wuu! Horse on!

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Starlight – Muse




8 thoughts on “Hey Boss… Where Me Worms?!

  1. Hey Hey! I like the book recommendations. Hell I like something new and different. I have read numbers 1 & 2, absolutely brilliant. Will work on 3 & 4 next.

    I think Amazon should just do what they do best and not screw around, selling your book and allowing you to whore out the sell out! Why not?? And it was a good thing that your blog screwed around with you, now its FRESH and CLEAN.

    Write on!

    • It has sharpened up a tad alright. Might make it even sharper, just don’t want to re-jig too much.

      3 and 4 are mighty read on.

      A lot going on… Worm on. Whure on. Write on! Giddy up!

  2. I’ve read number 1 and 3 and, honestly, The Alchemist bored me, but loved Lunar Park. I may read number 4 when I have time

    And you say that your book is sold out? That’s why I got the weirdest order confirmation the other day saying it would be shipped “soon”. I thought “soon” meant this week, but now I don’t know what to think… I told you Amazon hates me.

    • Amazon are holding a grudge! I think soon means soon in this case, as opposed to them saying sold out, will be back in stock soon. Your eyes will have a feast soon!

      I think with book 1 and 4 you almost have to be looking for them to fully get into them. Or maybe not. Who knows. Worm on!

  3. Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close was that type of book for me, reading at light speed to see what happens next. Loved it.

    also, “Swordfish. Peas. Corn. Onions. Toasted.” sounds like a dream sandwich!

    • I must check that book out, another added to the collapsing shelves!

      And I knew someone else out there would have taste. A mighty sandwich which so far has been scorned. Tut tut.

    • Quite clearly I would be preaching to the choir, you are in the know! Savage sandwich. George Foreman it up!

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