Fun, Funds & Funk Me Pink

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Today was a fun day of meetings up in Dubla. And by fun, I mean productive. On a quick side-ish note, not mainly today, but I’ve realized something which happens now and again to me during meetings. That is, I am not always fully, 100% aware of what point exactly a person might be making to me. Perhaps, the person making it actually doesn’t know themselves, but who knows. Anyways, the person might be telling me something, maybe gets bored half way through and then rambles off. I am looking at them enthusiastically, waiting for the big bang point, so I can respond. The point that doesn’t really come. A bit like a few of my new jokes for stand-up, the ones needing proper punch lines. In the end, I am just left looking enthusiastically/intensely at the person, who is in turn looking back at me, waiting to hear what I have to make about their point. The one I didn’t really get. So we end up just sitting there, for a brief awkward moment, looking at each other, not knowing who it is that is meant to be actually speaking next. Which is always fun!

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If I thought my traipsing all over L.A was tough enough, it is far harder back here in Ireland. At least in L.A, I found myself a hub (WeHooooo) where I could walk to most places. Even if it was an hour’s walk away. On Google’s map paper, it is well do-able. The problem is that while being back in Ireland, I am based out of Cork. Where not too much happens, in the world I am just to bust into. So, meetings are usually held in Dublin. Weekly trips to Dublin are actually a good laugh, don’t mind them. Sometimes though, conveniently, meetings are held in Galway too it seems. The day after a meeting in Dublin perhaps. Handy, handy. Tours of Ireland are always fun.

Best part of all, is the way one gets from Galway to Cork… bus on! Train to Dubla from Cork. Bus to Galway, wifi on-board, from Dublin. Then a bus back down to Cork from Galway, as there seems to be no other way. 

I have realized that the problem I am developing in Cork is slipping back into my old routines too easily. The rut is calling me! More and more programs of mine are now being recorded on Sky Plus. My sleeping patterns and daily activities are heading back the way I was before I headed to L.A. I have also noticed that I am not seeing hot, new women while out in Cork. Same as before so! Era shur, I’m only joking! There are plenty of hot women from Cork. Just no new hot women in Cork.

Getting the train up to Dublin, I started to wonder was it really worth it. Going up to Dublin, to drop in a 5 minute DVD, that really the postman could’ve done. But, just to be sure it got there on time, and to try and make another good impression when I met the person, I thought it would be best to head up and hand it in, in person. Great call. Fleeced by a company in Dublin to burn one DVD. €25 for a 5 minute DVD (not even fully 5 minutes) of my stand-up “highlights”, ha, so far back in Ireland. At the time I was in such a rush that it never clicked. Now though, all those helpful smiles and best of luck comments, and then charge me that much. Some joke. You can buy 6 copies of Superbad in Golden Discs for 24 bones. And, more importantly, that DVD is actually funny.

This morning I headed off to give Rita my DVD. Pumped, yet shattered from lack of sleep and being up so early. It was a highly strange combo. Anyways, I get to the place nice and early, unlike me. My good intentions did not quite go to plan. I was asked to have it in before a meeting that was going ahead on Thursday morning. As it turns out, I was far too early for the lady who wanted the DVD, before she went to the meeting to show it to others. I’ll wait around. Yeah, she should be in, in about 2 hours time maybe. Not too sure. Good stuff. Just wait around. In the end, I just met a girl who works with her, and gave her the DVD instead. I am an efficient postman if nothing else. All the way up to Dublin, for nothing. Some waste of time. 

Next port of call was onto Galway. Meeting with Tina on Friday, plus an informal meeting with a director/producer. Network on at the Film Festival and all that! I arrive into Galway at about 5.30 from Dublin, go straight to my hotel, and check my emails. The job, received an email at almost exactly at the time I arrived into Galway, telling me that my meeting with Tina, scheduled for the next day, was cancelled for some reason. The funking berries. I was giving the person’s phone number instead, and could do it over the phone if I like. Wuu. A phone call. Can’t they be made from Cork too?

Touring Ireland for absolutely no reason. Reading that email made me feel like a complete idiot. Being honest, I was pretty close to a nervous breakdown. I could feel my mind frying. Instead of letting that happen, I ended up just trashing my hotel room. T.V out the window, messed the sheets around a bit, and left the toilet sit up. It was a mess. Well I did all but one of those things. 

However, luckily, I can be a clever idiot at times. For some reason, my brain kicked in. Sent an email to the lady in charge of the festival. One thing led to another. Ended up being invited  for drinks, a meet and greet, before a big dinner that was going on in a hotel near mine. And, conveniently, the person I came up to Galway to meet, would be at the drinks shindig. I could now meet him there instead. Wuu huu. Time to bring out the charm!

Thankfully, the informal meeting, in the quiet corner of the packed room, went very well. More information has been asked for, interest shown, up to me to deliver, blah baa baa. That 20 minute meeting made the two days of traipsing around the country well worth it. Celebrate the small victories kind of thing. Did a bit more networking for myself while at the drinks shindig. Directors, producers, and even a gay couple, who looked a lot like the couple from Mexico, were all giving me their business cards. Speaking of which, I still need to get my own made up. It is below buying a new pen on the to-do list. I just gave them my blog address in return. A mighty calling card!

Something else kind of made the 2 days of touring all seem worthwhile. Night ended normal enough. Kind of. Some guy I recognized from t.v, real country guy, no clue of his name though, started singing Dirty Old Town with me at the bar in a rowing club (random enough?). Apparently I was singing it to myself (again… ? Maybe a defense mechanism for knowing no one at these things) So, he decided, in between asking me questions in Irish, that we should both horse into a full on song. Good laugh, arm in arm with him at the bar. Me sober. Him paralytic. Me departing. Him falling off the stool. Me coming back to write my business card address on his hand. All about the networking, making my mark.

There was a better point in there that would’ve wrapped it all up nicely. However, due to being tired beyond belief, it eludes me at this moment. So, a song will have to do…

Best Coast

Sun Was High (So Was I) - Best Coast

Treat ‘Em Mean!

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I have two ways to describe my morning so far. One is to say I am just, just over an hour early for the train to Dublin. The other route would be to say I literally missed the original train I planned to get by 5 seconds. Not even, really, I managed to get through the gate but couldn’t stop the automatic doors from closing on me. I could have made it if I dumped by bags while I ran, but that would just have been dumb. Almost, as dumb, as someone missing their train. Especially when that someone was up 2 & 1/2 hours before the train was due to leave.

After barely making my last four trains to and from Dublin by the skin of my teeth, it was inevitable that I would miss one soon. No one to blame, except myself really. Although, I could push the boat out and say that if my friend, who I had to call to, en route to the station, was able to throw keys like a normal person, it might have been a different story. Instead, the keys did not make it over a waist-high gate. This led to me jumping over the gate, having to pick them out of a bush, hop back over the gate and then whiz off in my car. A highly valuable 30 seconds, at least, was wasted there.

I also managed to neatly place my hand in the same place twice while jumping over the gate and back. At the time I thought the stuff was moss. Squishy, white moss. Now though, I see that it is something else entirely. Whereas I was picking something up from my friend’s house, it seems the birds were dropping stuff off. Omens of good luck never hurt anyone I suppose. Anyways, I wont blame him. Or the birds. My fault all the way.

The wise old saying “treat ‘em mean, keep ‘em keen” is familiar to most. I am beginning to realize that it should be used in a lot of different walks of life. Not just one. For example, nobody is really a fan of over the top, full-on, bombardment when they first meet a girl. Well, maybe you are, but I wouldn’t be a fan myself. However, now and again I forget this, and end up doing the same myself. Well, maybe not so much in that area, but definitely others.

About a week or so ago, lets just say I met a girl in Dublin. We’ll call her Rita. First meeting we clicked big time, started brightly. We got on well, all the right boxes were ticked, the timing was right, could this be fate?! After the initial date, a few phone calls and emails were sent, bit of texting went on. Forward and back, Roddick to Federer, this was looking good. Then, I heard nothing from Rita for a few days. So I sent another text. Still nothing. This led to my imagination running off a tad. I started to think how could Rita just cut me loose like that. What did I do to ruin the groundwork that had gone before? I thought we would fly through the initial phase of our blossoming relationship, and plough on from there. Why won’t Rita ring and confirm that we are an item! At least let me get to 2nd base!!!!

Yesterday, Rita did call me. All was fine, things were still normal, regular conversation. She likes to take things slowly it seems. Things take time and all that. Oh right, my bad, I was getting ahead of myself a bit. Clingy, Id say Rita was probably thinking. We had just met. I wanted to jump straight into a relationship. Should’ve held back, played hard to get. Instead, I did the worst thing possible, and ended up just sitting around over thinking things. Ape.

Not to worry, I have my wits back with me again. Now, I am off to do what I should’ve done earlier… hook up with Rita’s friend. Tina, we’ll call her, was onto me recently. Being honest, I wasn’t sure if I’d do it to Rita and all that, me being a gentleman and all. However, Tina just wants to meet up for a coffee or something. Just a friendly meeting, nothing too serious or anything. See how it goes. I have a plan. Might see if Tina is up for doing something with Rita. More the merrier. 3-some on! Speaking of which, I forgot they’ve a 3rd friend.

First song of the day…

Brendan Benson

Poised and Ready - Brendan Benson

And one final song for yesterday…

Will You Be There - Michael Jackson

Have You Ever…?

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Seeing as some folk complained that they didn’t know when the debut was last week (spoof), I will start off with a plug. If anyone is in Dublin tomorrow night (tonight? Thursday, the 2nd) round 2 of stand-up in Ireland is going ahead in Temple Bar, the more hecklers the merrier! I can’t believe I’ve just advertised on the blog, I have well and truly sold out. How much did I get paid for that? Back to the blogaruu…

Have you ever been introduced to someone, who you already kind of know, but was never properly introduced to them? Sober anyways. And you know that they don’t like you. As in numerous people might have told you, how much that person went on about your immense downfalls or shortcomings, over and over again at a party one night, that kind of thing. And you probably don’t have time for that person either, seeing as they bothered to bitch about you, without ever even speaking to them. However, the person who is introducing, is completely oblivious to all this. Then the third party slowly starts to get a vibe, as it finally dawns on them, that X does not seem to like you, and you don’t seem to be too open to X in return. The great, awkward “Oh, do ye know each other already? Have ye met before” moment kicks in. And the fun is had. No? Me neither.

Have you ever had to catch a train to Dublin at 8.30, but decided to first jump in the shower at about 8.04. With the train station about a 15 minute drive at least, depending on traffic. And leaving any bit of packing to be done, until after the shower? Then wonder why you bothered? Nope? Me neither.

Have you ever then, to make matters worse, actually spent the whole entire train trip making out a demo mix, which you have actually been asked for a while back, and asked again today, by a promoter of a brand new club in L.A. Could be a big break. And you are on fire! One of the greatest D.J’ing performances, known to mankind, is occurring on a train from Cork to Dublin. You will proudly show off your mixing and remixing talent, with this 2 hour mix that you have just performed, and recorded, on the mostly empty section of the train. Until, of course, you realize, whoops, must not have recorded that actually. You are certain that you did, better check again… no, didn’t work for some reason. The job. Anyone? Me neither.

Have you ever made out a highly important to-do list. Vital stuff on the list, in order of priority, buckle down and have to get through it before the weekend, must make this week count. Then, you realize that you have actually put at number 2 on that list, prioritizing it as the 2nd most important thing you need to do, is to buy a pen. Even though you are writing the list with a pen, and have a handful in your bag, you really need this special type of pen, or else you can’t move on to number 3 on the list. Nay? Me nayther.

Final one, have you ever woke up to rain absolutely bucketing down outside your window? Skies are grey, horrendous looking day, it is a bad start. From that alone, if you were to predict what the rest of it may be like, you would think “bleak”. Then, within 5 minutes, or however long it might take you to read a text and check your emails, it immediately turns into the best day all week. By far. So far, anyways. All those annoying things that you were impatiently waiting on all day Monday, started to trickle back your way, all with good news. Good as in progress was still being made, baby steps and all. Yeah? Me too! Today! Pretty weird.

I lied, one last one… Have you thought to yourself “I am fairly tired. Very in fact. I know, I’ll do a blogaruu based around the game – Have you ever? – and it’ll actually be a good one. Yeah, that sounds like a plan” Then, after you type it all up, you realize, eh, maybe that was a horrendous idea? Maybe that did no go as well as you planned. Perhaps you should’ve slept on the train, instead of not recording a great mix? Em, not fully sure, but I think I may have definitely done that one too. Does not bode well for stand-up tomorrow night!

New songs a plenty, here is just one…

Fleet Foxes

Blue Spotted Tail - Fleet Foxes