LonDumb – Part I

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Border Control

Unbelievable – EMF

Cab’s outside. My clothes are still wet. What. The. Funk. Dryer mysteriously died the night before. Damp garments strewn all over my abode. Dry, funkers, dry!! Need to pack you, you and you. Need ye all for my trip to London. Vital I have that white t-shirt and that white t-shirt and that pair of socks, vita– Actually. I’ve over packed as is, so, I, don’t. Ha. Cab man’s beeping. Com-ing! And out the door I go. Flustered little whure. Still on time. Just leaving packing until the very last minute. But. Not to worry. On the road! Just swing by Kailand’s house. Swoop her up. My mighty London trip partner in crime. Honk honk. Out comes Kailand and her smaller suitcase up. How is hers smaller than mine? Maybe a more ergonomical packer? Is ergonomical even a word? Who knows, who cares, I’m sweating, lugging luggage, my top’s now off, panting in the back off the mini bus, Jesus, L.A is hot today, and now we are actually on our way. Off to England for a spot of tea and crumpets. LonDumb, here we… Ahem.

Sweaty Boy

Check in. Air New Zealand. Bumped up. Premium. Oh Betsy. Mighty. Notice Mischa Barton checking in one ahead. Moving up to the C-List of the world. Security. Sandwich. Wait. Board. Dancing. Suss out our seats. Appears we have done well. Premium means pod. As in instead of a cramped row of seats in the mule class behind, we are now swimming in space in a pod like container. Buckets of room. Kind of like First Class. But just not quite. Still. Pod class all the way. Flying like winners across the Atlantic. Mighty. Highly recommended!

Pod Air New Zealand

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Bang. Bang. Ba. Ng.

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Roxanne – Strange Talk

Birthday. Birthmonth. Bert on! Beach. Party. Celebration. Malibu. Malibooze. Maliboobs! Paradise. Cove. Kaw. Bird. Shrimp. Wine. Cocktails. Lounge chairs. Hi life. Hello living. Drink. Glass. My. Hand. Gulp. Pause. Laugh. Another drin- Plop. Huh? Seagull. Kaw. Kaw. KAAWW! Flying. Attacking. Dropping. Dumping. Plopping. Into. Glass. Hand. Mine. Dunk. Lucky? Me!

So that was a fun birthday. Speaking of… Continue Reading »

What Do You Call An Irish Guy Who…

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Tonight (Original Mix) (feat. Maja Ivarsson) – Felix Cartal

Also. Here’s a mighty Continue Reading »

#15 – Valentine’s Day Joke

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Wrote a mighty poem today. Felt it should be shared. Things went weird. Blacked out. Woke up. Heard the door shut. Fecking. Milkman: Joke of the Day – Wahey!

My Wonderful Book: Click!

Don’t Go Breaking My Heart (With Kiki Dee) – Elton John

Walk – Foo Fighters

 

#14 – Forgot The Joke Joke

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So… The other day I got a mighty video review on Amazon. Tut. Sorry. So… First ever video review. Made me laugh. A lot. So… Here’s my video response. First ever one so please bear with me. I did also kind of forget to tell a joke. Isn’t that hilarious!?! Ha. Hm. You just never know with live TV: Joke of the Day – Wahey!

Tiny Dancer – Elton John

We Can Dance (Frames Remix) – Lancelot

And by the by, if anyone happens to be looking for a group hotels booking website, try Dingadeal! They have not paid me to say this. I. Swear. Ahem. Pah.

#13 – The Librarian Joke

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Great vague news: Mighty day! Wuu huu wahey. White abyss. Over. But enough about that gibber that makes little sense unless you live in my head. Mighty place. Back to the good stuff, the gold, the honey, the marbles: Joke of the Day – Wahey!

Wild Ones (Shoe Scene Symphony Remix) – Sia

Lost Found (Black Light Smoke Remix) – Francis Harris