LonDumb – Part II


Charles II

Continuing on from LonDumb – Part I …

It’s A Long Way To Tipperary – Little Green Cars

What do you call a ponder pipe that just lays around all day? Mopey Dick. Badum. My first day in London, I was moping like no other. Woke up early. Phoned the prison. Spoke to Kailand. Told me her news – “They keep giving us bananas and milk for meals, I’m hooked on the milk.” Slurp. Filled her in on my news – US Embassy said there’s nothing they can do, magistrates decision so just have to sort it out when you get home. Some dose. Slurp. Kailand is upset. But still. Her spirits are high. Night’s sleep always helps in fairness. Or else they were spiking the milk.

It was then realised that it must be hard to keep conversations flowing with people in prison. Both had filled the other in in detail what had happened since we saw each other last (about 24 hours ago). After that, our news seemed insignificant or non-existence. I’d phone back and Kailand would tell me she had a nice non-English speaking conversation with an Indian woman about milk. I’d inform Kailand that the hotel room was nice but all the TV stations seemed to be showing was the Big Bang Theory. Then Kailand had to go to get more milk. I’d phone back. Find out if the milk was really cold or room temperature. Called off again to go brush her teeth if she wanted to. Phone back again and then… I was told Kailand had been taken away. Being brought back to the airport. Put on a flight. Which flight? Wouldn’t tell me? What time? Hung up on me. Dose. Wouldn’t speak to Kailand about milk again until she was back in L.A, eating some Thanksgiving turkey and egg nog. So that was a balls. Continue Reading »

Milky Meh Hee Ko!!!

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Today has just been a really super, super, SUPER day, really super. I watched Milk, in San Francisco, how inspiring. I think I might put on my rainbow t-shirt and run down Castro giving high fives. It is a savage movie though, the acting is unreal. Especially after living in West Hollywood, seeing the gay mannerisms that Sean Penn and Emile Hirsh have are brilliant, funking savage. Sean Penn should’ve won an Oscar for that performance, maybe next year.

Another reason today is so so SO super, is that I am off to Meh hee ko, finally. I am heading there with Andy and Colin Todd in case anyone was wondering. Also known as on my todd. Also quite commonly known as on my own. In fact, I am probably there now as we speak. I found a clever little addition to the blog where I can post them at a set time in the future, so I’ve set the alarm ahead for this one. Hopefully, in the next few days I won’t be online and able to ballyblog on. If I am, take it as a bad sign. I will be leaving spring break down if I find time to be on Spacebook et al.

Although technically I am going there to get some writing done. And I will technically be there from L.A. So, technically I could use the spoof line that I’m a writer down from L.A, taking a break from acting, and working on a project, if any girls happen to ask. Which would also technically mean I will be as bad as that gimp I met on the flight up to San Fran from L.A. It’s all technicalities really. I think I’ll just stick with the truth… I’m a priest from Ireland, trainee priest anyways, this is my last holiday before I get ordained. Honesty is the best policy! Forgive me Father!

Here are two songs of the day before I depart. The first is dedicated to Harvey Milk, super song, don’t give up, fight on Harv… Ali In The Jungle by The Hours

The second one I dedicate to myself before I hit the pool in my thong and covered in baby oil down in Mexico… Golden Cage (Fred Falke Remix) by The Whitest Boy Alive