My Piece of Crap Joke #19 (Also: Edit)

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Float – KO KO

Ever get into a machine mode? As in you are Charlie Sheen’s Mum? (Ma Sheen. Get it? Hilarious.) Today was one of those days. Mighty. Dawn to dawn. (Nice girl.) Got some amount of buckets of work done. As in… Well, nothing concrete that I will bore you with now. But, let’s just say, it’s at least like wet cement at the moment. Let it sit. Let it settle. Let it go. Even now the gibber is still flowing. So. I made a video. Because I am an enigmanure. Obviously. Joke of the Day – Wahey!

Oh. And there was also this fine spread in an Irish paper today. Me naked legs spread wide over two pages. Mighty mighty. Although I was promised a seven page spread. But I’ll get over that. One thing that is odd to see is when your stuff is edited or quotes are just made up. Never really a fan of that. In case you ever wondered what goes on in the editing world, here’s an example of a slight edit… Continue Reading »

Purple Patch. Green Honey.

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Yesterday. Walked out of my lift. Went left. Down the hallway. Towards my apartment. Fork. Turned left. Glanced right. Happened to see. A dude panned out on the ground. Face down. Hands sprawled out. Grocery bags around him. Lying there. Down and out. Motionless. Stopped going left. Stood. Looked. Wondered. Waited for him to move. Finally he shifted. Muttered something to himself. Asked if he was ok. Stopped shifting. Took a step closer to him. Asked again. Heard him say he was ok. Ok. OK. Got the feeling he didn’t want me to help. Proud fool.┬áMade sure he was okay? Didn’t respond this time. Shifted his hands as if he was about to push himself up. Not much I could do. Except just leave him be.┬áHeaded off to my apartment. Subtly looking back. Obviously. Watching the proud fool lift himself up. Phoenix, rising up. Didn’t need my help! Hauled himself back up on his own! Well, he actually just rolled over. Half sat up. Cursed his shoe. And tied his shoelace. Which is when I realised it was my deaf neighbour. Who saw me just standing down the hallway. Looking at him. Probably wondering why I didn’t offer to help him up. Proud fool. My neighbours are big fans of me. Continue Reading »