Half Naked, Half Leprechaun, One Third Potato

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Irish LA

Can’t beat being on the front page of a newspaper wearing a leprechaun hat. Couldn’t find a version online so here’s the original gibber. Recent radio interview too where I ramble on and on and on. New book PREDUMB out soon. Narcissistic levels reaching new high.

Mountain Dew – The Clancy Brothers

Blacks, whites, Asians, Native Americans, almost everyone I’ve met since I came to L.A. claims to be Irish in one way or another. At first it annoyed me purely because their logic was so ridiculous.

One guy told me one night at a party “I’m Irish too!” Oh yeah, what part are you from? “Ohio.” Oh really? I wasn’t aware that was in Ireland. “Yeah, it’s not.” And then he walked away.

Another guy later remarked Continue Reading »

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RanDumb Teaser… An Irish-American Classic.

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Made this a while ago for TV meetings and the likes. Tease on, as they say. Here’s the tale of it all -> I Shot The Sheriff. Sticking it up for Paddy’s Day, how wonderful. RanDumber shall be free this weekend too so keep on eye out for that. Spread the glorious gibber. Watch on!

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Buy RanDumber UK: http://amzn.to/GNzvEO
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Me. Naked. Leprechaun.

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Lord of the Dance – Enya

Oh Betsy. RanDumber is out. People are buying her. And she is being read. What a day. All together now… Mighty!!! To celebrate, here’s some video gibber…

Also, just found out someone has now leaked the first five chapters in total. What what?! For feck’s sake… Might as well read seeing that they’re out there.

Read the first five chapters of RanDumber -> CLICK!

If you’d like to buy RanDumber -> SNAP HER UP!

For the Kindle -> SNAP ON!

For those in the UK -> GIDDY UP!

Finally, RanDumb is free for the next three days > WEE HUU!

The Irish Rover – The Pogues & The Dubliners

RanDumber. Out Now. Free Book! Happy St. Pa’Tricks Day!

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Come On Eileen – Dexy’s Midnight Runners

I am quite giddy and also quite tired but both and neither matter. What matters is that RanDumber being available to buy online on Paddy’s Day is now a reality. Oh. Betsy. Dancing! Some day! HAPPY ST. PA’TRICKS HAYES ALL THE WAY!!!

As it stands, it’s available to buy on Amazon.com so far. You. Fecking. Beauty.

If you would like to get the ball rolling and snap a mighty copy up -> GO HERE!

For all the mighty Kindle readers out there -> GO HERE NOW!

Kindle folk in the UK -> YEE HUU!

In celebration of such a mighty occasion, RanDumb (rated #1 on Amazon Humor) shall be free for three days! If you would like that for  free-> GO HERE!

In case you were wondering, a mighty introduction was written by… Well just have a look and see. Duu. For now, I must sleep a bit. Did I tell you I saw Jerry Seinfeld in stand-up a few hours ago. What a show. What a man! Genius. Mighty to see. That is the bar. Could this day be any better?!! I’ll shall be back later with more gibber and a video to boot too. Wuu. Huu. Now go: Pants. Off. Read. On!!!!

Celebration – Kool & The Gang

Bob And Norm

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Bob – Drive-By Truckers

So my buddy Bob is visiting at the moment. Two weeks in LA, first time here. Go on the Bob! Now I fully realise what it’s like to be a single parent. No longer just a randumb dope on my own. Permanent plus one as well. Juggling tour guidance with work. Detached from my own thoughts. Neglecting my mistress, el blogaruu. Tough going for a Nark like myself. Which is why I’ve now taken a vow of abstinence until marriage. Better safe than sorry. Ahum’p. Like a few of my buddies, Bob has bought my book Randumb, but hasn’t read it. Doesn’t actually admit this to me, so I like to ask him what’s his favourite part and then he changes the subject (Unless he just has no favourite part! Ha. Eh. Meh). As a result it’s fair to say he had no clue what to expect of the LA way. Bob, say goodbye to Norm… Continue Reading »

Great Expectations! Oh St. Pa’tricks…

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I’m Shipping Up to Boston – Dropkick Murphys

Blogaruu, she’s been a while! My bad for the delay. Quite busy with vital stuff. Such as realising that I might be a fairy (apparently fairies can only handle or feel one emotion at a time. I am a full on fairy. Call me Tinker). And speaking of menstrual cycles… So back in the day, whenever a girl complained to me about cramps, I would complain back about people who complain a lot. Until I realised I actually can empathise. I too get man periods. Once a month. Every month. Rent cramps kick in. So now, I feel their pain. Similarly, whenever a girl complained about the thought of giving birth, I would shrug my shoulders and mention never having to deal with the pain of getting a kick in the fuss-balls. Until for some reason I thought about it like this: Imagine a little person exiting through the back door of your gift shop. If you know what I mean. I don’t think guys can fathom anything leaving through the front door, what with us not having one and all. But the back door seems to make it imaginable. Imagine that pain. Ripping. Tearing. Uncooperative. Sweet. Holy. Jesus. Must be ridiculous. Even thinking of it now is making my sphincter scream and squirm. So now I kind of understand the terror girls must have. Even worse, imagine if after all that, the child was to turn out like someone like the person writing this? For all that pain?! Dose. Apologies, Mum. Continue Reading »

Dancing With Leperchauns

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Maybe I’m just a wee bit of a funking idiot. Maybe it’s just because I had an average day and night. Maybe I just didn’t celebrate it the right way. Maybe it’s because I didn’t get to go to a parade. Or. Maybe. Perhaps. Paddy’s Day. Is. Quite over-rated. Ridiculously so? Maybe if I was American. And needed to feel more Irish. As it is the cool thing to be. To be true. Perhaps. Or. If I worked a 9-5 job and got the day off work, just to celebrate. Then. Perhaps. Paddy’s Day might live up to the hype. However. I am not. I do not. Instead. Tried too hard. Thought too much. Hype machine. Overload. Hyperventilating. Brown bag. Hi Pip. Meet ape. Continue Reading »