Half Naked, Half Leprechaun, One Third Potato

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Irish LA

Can’t beat being on the front page of a newspaper wearing a leprechaun hat. Couldn’t find a version online so here’s the original gibber. Recent radio interview too where I ramble on and on and on. New book PREDUMB out soon. Narcissistic levels reaching new high.

Mountain Dew – The Clancy Brothers

Blacks, whites, Asians, Native Americans, almost everyone I’ve met since I came to L.A. claims to be Irish in one way or another. At first it annoyed me purely because their logic was so ridiculous.

One guy told me one night at a party “I’m Irish too!” Oh yeah, what part are you from? “Ohio.” Oh really? I wasn’t aware that was in Ireland. “Yeah, it’s not.” And then he walked away.

Another guy later remarked Continue Reading »

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Me. Naked. Leprechaun.

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Lord of the Dance – Enya

Oh Betsy. RanDumber is out. People are buying her. And she is being read. What a day. All together now… Mighty!!! To celebrate, here’s some video gibber…

Also, just found out someone has now leaked the first five chapters in total. What what?! For feck’s sake… Might as well read seeing that they’re out there.

Read the first five chapters of RanDumber -> CLICK!

If you’d like to buy RanDumber -> SNAP HER UP!

For the Kindle -> SNAP ON!

For those in the UK -> GIDDY UP!

Finally, RanDumb is free for the next three days > WEE HUU!

The Irish Rover – The Pogues & The Dubliners

Hello, Ian…

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Handle With Care – Traveling Wilburys

So the other day I walked into the doctor’s and said:

Hello, doctor Ian, I have this slight cough for a while now, can you-

Say no more, he said, just drop the pants, jump up on the bed, lie on your side and we’ll take a look. 

Down they went. Up I jumped. Over I lay. And only then did I think:

Hmmm. O-Kaaaayyyyyyy!

So that was odd. Cold. Knuckley. And uncomfortable.

But at least the cough’s now gone.

Finger Licking Bad

Speaking of fingers, there I was yesterday, dressed as a leper chaun, getting ready Continue Reading »

Dancing With Leperchauns

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Maybe I’m just a wee bit of a funking idiot. Maybe it’s just because I had an average day and night. Maybe I just didn’t celebrate it the right way. Maybe it’s because I didn’t get to go to a parade. Or. Maybe. Perhaps. Paddy’s Day. Is. Quite over-rated. Ridiculously so? Maybe if I was American. And needed to feel more Irish. As it is the cool thing to be. To be true. Perhaps. Or. If I worked a 9-5 job and got the day off work, just to celebrate. Then. Perhaps. Paddy’s Day might live up to the hype. However. I am not. I do not. Instead. Tried too hard. Thought too much. Hype machine. Overload. Hyperventilating. Brown bag. Hi Pip. Meet ape. Continue Reading »

Hey Boy, Like Cows? Actually…

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Cowboy

Have you ever foolishly decided not to bother wearing a costume at Halloween? I’ll just go as I am. No need for a costume. No? Thankfully, me neither. However, I do remember two years ago I almost did. Promoting a night in a nightclub on Halloween night. Usually might only be concerned about whether the club was going to be busy or not. However, seeing as it was a banker to be a success, I was able to chill out beforehand. Have a few boozes. Which I think was the reason why myself and two other buddies decided at the very last minute that we’d better wear some sort of costume. Thank holy Jesus we did. Simply for the fact that I remember out of about 800 people in the club that night, there were only three people who weren’t in costumes. Three guys in a group looking absolutely gutted. Standing out like sore thumbs. While my two buddies and I were delighted with our soccer player, chef and priest outfits. What chumps those other three guys were! Close call. Continue Reading »