It Was All A Dream… (Part II)

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Dreadlock Holiday – 10cc

‘Hey mon… Hey womon… Hey wom-on, come sit on my lap wom-on. I take good care of you my wom-on, OK. You no need to worry about any of that no more my wom-on. You be my white prin-cess…’

Within an hour of landing, I had become a fully fledged Pirate of the Caribbean. (Illegally downloaded a copy of RanDumb from a torrent site. Say nothing.) Within a week of landing, this pirate had been transformed. Adventure. On! 

So we land. Get off the jet. And then what? Drive through a pitch black rainforest, past pineapple fields, up to the top of a mountain, to a secluded hidden restaurant that turns out to also be an art gallery, overlooking the island – Check!

My mouth started Continue Reading »

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Sea! No Hangover…

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Woke up. Stood up. Swaying. Big time. Bounced off one wall. Slid into the bathroom. Drunk? Eh. Hungover? No. Should be. Thankfully. Not in the slightest. Just a tad tired. Drink all the fruity Merlins, Jerk and Merkatinis cocktails that I can come up with. Hangovers don’t exist in the land I’m in now. Figured that out after the first 3 days. No Fear to fear here. Plain sailing. In the land of the sea. Left my brain back at the port. Hangover off! Climb the spiraling stairs from my cabin. Hey hup. Fresh fruit platter me up. Brunch on. Stewardeses scurrying aboot. Smiling while I order. Cursing me with their eyes at my order. Good old healthy eating. Eat what you have to. So you can drink what you want. Wrap it all up with a please and danke. Continue Reading »