Bang. Bang. Ba. Ng.

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Roxanne – Strange Talk

Birthday. Birthmonth. Bert on! Beach. Party. Celebration. Malibu. Malibooze. Maliboobs! Paradise. Cove. Kaw. Bird. Shrimp. Wine. Cocktails. Lounge chairs. Hi life. Hello living. Drink. Glass. My. Hand. Gulp. Pause. Laugh. Another drin- Plop. Huh? Seagull. Kaw. Kaw. KAAWW! Flying. Attacking. Dropping. Dumping. Plopping. Into. Glass. Hand. Mine. Dunk. Lucky? Me!

So that was a fun birthday. Speaking of… Continue Reading »

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Pre-Paradise Prambles…

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Man On Fire – Edward Sharpe & The Magnetic Zeros

Not sure where my dose of self-diagnosed claustrophobia came from exactly. Maybe from when I was in fifth class in primary school. And for some reason a group of us were put in class with people in sixth class. The Special Ones, as we called ourselves. Too smart for fifth class! As a result, we were let run free on Continue Reading »

Sheep. Strawberries. And. Pat.

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Chigadaging – Ukulélé Club de Paris

“It’s just great that you’re back!”

Yeah, mighty!

“How was the flight? What did you eat? Have you eaten? What would you like to eat? I have chicken, turkey, ham, steak-“

Mum…

“Oh right, something healthier? I have salad, salmon, sea bass-“

No, Mum… Mum.

“We could get something else if you lik-“

MUUUUUMMMMAAARRRGGGGHHHH!!!

And with that my Mum drove straight through the barrier in the airport car park. Continue Reading »

Obeasts!

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Learning To Fly – Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers

Close my eyes. Time to sleep through this flight. Eyes shut for a minute. Mambo  number five in the aisle bounces off my head. Wakes me up. See something white on my pants as I open my eyes. Oh God. What was I dreaming about? No, this is a small thing. Pick it up. A mint. More to the point, a wet mint. By the looks of it, just fell out of someone’s mouth and onto my lap. Nelly to my right sneezes again. Plane hits a pocket of turbulence. Mambo bounces off me again. See now that it is her ass hitting off me. Feels slightly moist as it bounces off the side of my face. Wet, like the mint. Maybe sweat? Who knows, who cares?

And so began my wonderful flight home to Ireland. For some reason I am unsure of now, I did not Continue Reading »

This Is A Trailer… HAHAHAHAHAHAW

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RanDumber Hardback: Oooh yeaah!
RanDumber US: Buy It!
RanDumber UK: Go Here!
RanDumb US: Click!
RanDumb UK: Giddy Up!

Closing Credits – Mason Daring

BAAAaack In The US-Wahey, I Am…

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Born In The USA – Bruce Springsteen

Back in LA-wahey wuu huu! Mighty quick trip back to Ireland. Nice if it was longer but what can you duu? I came. I kissed. I conquered. Castles. Stones. Mead. The whole shebang. Weddings. Whistles. Wallops. Some hoot. Even had the odd owl. Speeches. Stand-up. Sheep. Good bit to catch up on in the old blogaruu. Need a day or two to let it percolate in my brain. Until then, how about an article I wrote for a Sunday newspaper this week. Life of a Chancer. Read. On. Continue Reading »

Ode My God…

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Assassin’s Tango – John Powell

Sweet Lord. Would you look at this. A mighty RanDummy (@Janebustard) has written a gem all about RanDumb. Some odyssey. Ode on!

An Ode to RanDumb… 

Have you ever heard of Mark Hayes?
He’s an Irish guy, lives in LA.
He’s a writer of note
And I’d give him my vote
And his third book is now underway.
**
Mark Hayes has a talent you see
He is charming as well, you’ll agree.
He can DJig it too
And do stand up, it’s true
He’s a man of all talents is he.
**
So he started a blog on the net
Making notes, so he wouldn’t forget
All the things that he did
Trying to earn a few quid
And the oddest of people he’d met.
**
Mark’s blog got the name “Trickaduu”
Where’d that come from? I haven’t a clue…
It’s a pretty cool name
And deserves some acclaim
As do all Mark’s wee sayings, like “Duu”.
**
Moving on to Mark’s mighty first book
It’s called RanDumb, you must take a look
You will love it I’m sure
When you’ve read it, you’ll whure…
Or start talking Mark’s gobbledegook!!! Continue Reading »